SURVIVAL & HEALING
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Therapy and How a Woman Named Mary Helped Me
She lived in a small cottage in Crescent Hill with a white picket fence. I walked through the front door into her living room and knew instantly that I was in the right place. Mary was tall and thin with long white hair. My new therapist had the natural look of a woman who felt comfortable in her own skin. Views: 791
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Healing the Past and The Beginning of Number Two
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Art in Nature
If we take the time to be still and open our eyes to everything around us, it’s amazing what we will find. I was on Samana Cay in the Bahamas and I was upset because it had been cloudy all day and we were unable to snorkel. It’s crazy how we humans can be in paradise and still allow ugly feelings to start rising up in us because the day isn’t going as planned. I remember being mad at the world as we landed on the island. I left my snorkel gear in the boat and stomped out of the water grumbling under my breath. Stop and Breathe My friend,…
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Surviving and The Trail of Ants
After my courageous self walked away from a 17 year marriage and survived, (read about it here) I had to start creating a new life. I was surviving! I changed my name back to my maiden name. That is who I was when I was happy. I needed to be that person again. I spent months recovering from my broken marriage. My children hated me because I refused to bad-mouth their father. They blamed me for the divorce. We Survived But we survived. My heart allowed itself to grieve. I threw myself into my job and my schooling and my children. And I survived. My ex was very angry. I…
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Abuse and Survival – Open Closets
I have been putting off writing my post about survival. It’s hard digging up past memories. But one of the goals of this blog is to share my experiences and maybe help someone else get one step closer to their own survival. It’s hard to say the word – Abuse. Abuse is abuse! A person doesn’t have to be hit, beaten, shoved or slapped in order to define their relationship as abuse. I was never hit, never beaten. But I do remember once being shoved across the bed during a very heated argument. I rationalized that away. Many Forms There is another form of abuse that is just as debilitating.…
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Surviving Abuse – My Lifeline
To continue the recent post about karate being my lifeline, I need to go back in time slightly. I was on the verge of just beginning the process of surviving abuse. Here’s how my lifeline found me. Sisterhood My Mom was part of a group of women who were spiritual. They not only meditated and searched for the meaning of life, but they were there for each other. It was a sisterhood. During some of my darkest moments, this group of women gathered around me and helped pull me back to reality. I can only describe them as being similar to, but more spiritual than the women in the movie,…
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Out of the Abyss – Losing Myself
When I married my first husband, and father of my two children, life changed. He already had two young boys. So I was instantly a 20 year old stepmother of two. Despite the pleading of my parents to at least wait until after graduation, I quit college at the beginning of my junior year to get married. I convinced myself that my life would be wonderful. My life would consist of creating a happy home with my new husband and his boys. There Were Signs There were signs that things were not good even before the marriage. I missed these. Signs of infidelity, emotional abuse, anger, control issues. We fought…
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I Am a Dreamer
I am a dreamer. That is the best way to describe me. I could disappear into a room and daydream for hours. I can create the most amazing scenarios in my head if given a few minutes of alone time. Giving Up My Dream At the age of 19, I gave up the dream to be an artist. I was studying Art in college and was very good at it. But I was young, rebellious and made some choices that changed the course of my young adult life. I quit school and decided to marry a man that my parents forbid me to marry. This was the pivotal moment that…
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Unhealthy Relationships and Recreating My Life
Unhealthy choices over the years caused me to lose sight of who I truly am. Through many different outlets and the help of wonderful friends, I have enjoyed the journey back and can’t wait to tell my story. Now that I am in my 50’s, actually pushing 60, there is an entirely different set of worries. Wrinkles and how to age in a graceful way instead of with dread. I Am Ready For Change But I am ready to take on the challenge. I woke up one day, looked in the mirror and realized that overnight I started looking old. Noooooo! This can’t be! My brain thinks I am still…
